JamiroFan2000
Correspondent
Joined: 21 Mar 2002
Posts: 2881
Location: The Jamiroquaized States Of America
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 Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2004 20:16 |
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The JamiroQuai Newsbrief of the Week (Comic Series #6)!!
JamiroFan2000 skips into the Newsroom happily holding a ice cream cone humming "Space Cowboy" to himself. Fan jumps and lands with a light thud into the newschair, still licking from his ice cream cone, he shuffles his papers. The Cameraman walks in, spots Fan licking his cone, walks over and says, "Why Hello Fan, what flavors did you get on your cone!" Inbetween licks, Fan answers with, "Oh, my favorite flavors, one scoop of Napolitan & a new flavor I concocted for them to make me. I called it 'Jamiroquai Jambolicious Jubejells', chocolate and vanilla ice cream packed with Buffaloman shaped jubejells candy pieces!" The Cameraman, whose mouth is watering asks, "Ooohh, that sounds really good, can I have a lick?" Jam, finishing off a lick, flares his eyebrows at him replies with, "No way mister! I'm not into that kind of..errr...what you call "fetish"!" The Cameraman rolls his eyes and says, "No, no, can I have a lick of your ice cream cone." Fan nods and says, "Uh nope, sorry, unless you plan to give me a money difference in how much you lick of my cone in ice cream, and by my estimates, that would come out to $3.50." The Cameraman frowns and snaps back with, "Cheapskate!" Jam flares his eyebrows again and replies, "Screw you assface, you want a cone, the parlor is down the street." The Cameraman takes his position and says, "Oh ok whatever...we're on in 3..2..1." (The lights fade to black on the set and turn on bright, the broadcast begins)
"Merry overly humid Summer JamiroBakers..hehe, this is your ice creamed, tummy singing, and spicy dish of steaming MAN JamiroFan2000 here with your weekly dose of the Newsbrief of the week...Ha Ha Ha (A Bad Anchorman laugh)! Let's jump into the deep end of the pool and go straight to Tonight's TOP STORY: JK in Trouble Again! It looks like our Favorite Mad Hatter has drawn himself onto a future 'Wanted' poster. According to the Funkin Site and the rather saucy Page 3 packed Sun Newspaper, JK has been spotted in the UK recently, even when his lawyer told a Scottish court that JK wouldn't available for his impending 'speeding' court case cause he was in the states doing recording for the 6th Jam album in NYC till Sept. 2004. If the courts consider this a 'additional offense', they could issue a 'apprehension warrant' for the arrest for JK. Geez...this could really start a new 'bounty hunter' market in the UK, couldn't you see JK being arrested by a bounty hunter, 'JK put your hands up, take your hat of slowly, I'm going to pat your hat down for weapons and foreign objects!' Ha Ha Ha Ha (A long series of Bad Anchorman laughs) Anyhoo, I'm sure JK will get off with a slap on the wrist and pay a large fine or something. In more happy news, it appears that one of my letters was answered in the latest issue of Penthouse magazine it reads...(Jam flares his eyes at the teleprompter operater and growls at him)...Uh, forget what I just said...in OTHER NEWS!! It appears that fellow Jamiroquai bandmembers Rob Harris & Matt Johnson have posted some messages to the fans on the Funkin Site Guestbook, I don't whether they are REAL or simply looking for a good time..hehe! But it is really nice to see them dropping in updates to let the fanbase know how the recording is going! You can read all the messages at the following link on the JAMIROQUAI Yahoo Group I moderate: http://launch.groups.yahoo.com/group/jamiroquai/message/1054 And in our final newsitem for this Newsbrief, The JamiroTalk International Fan Forums is about to celebrate it's 10,000 Total post, this is certainly a milestone, and I wish to congratulate myself, with this post, for reaching over 800 total posts in my over 2 year history on there. I would to thank myself, cause without me, this would have never have been possible! Uh...(Looks at papers)...oh I'm sorry, what I meant to say is that I would like to congratualate CosmicMouse, Funkmaster and CosmicBear for reaching this achievement and thank all my fellow soon be over 600 members for all their posts, perspectives, thoughts, loves, gripes and everything they have shared with us. All you have really done a great job and I have been honored and blessed to meet and make so many friends on here. From the bottom of my heart, thank you JamiroTalk.net, you have made us all better fans, and more importantly, a closer and stronger Jamily! Uh..I hate being emotional, but...(Starts to cry)...this forum has meant so much to me that...(The tears start streaming done his face). Oh well, that is this week's Newsbrief...take care and Keep Funkin!" (The Lights fade on the set)
The Cameraman walks up to fan who is wiping up his tears with a tissue and says, "And we're clear, wow Fan, that was a great speech at the end, seemed very heartfelt. The crew and I have never seen you like this!" Fan, after blowing his nose replies, "Oh yeah, I'm sorry, it's just I may seem like a overly joking ass all the time, but I do have a sensitive side I hate to show." The Crew and the Cameraman applaud at Fan who walks away saying, "Thank you Thank you...I love you all!"
 Ha Ha Ha ! I think I summed all my feelings there in the second half of this. Thank you for reading and congrats JamiroTalk.net   ! Peace!
Sincerely,
JamiroFan2000
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